Truth Is A Whisper: Lost Chapters 4 - End Of The Road

[ahopper84]

Title: Truth Is A Whisper
Rating: NC-17
Genre: Drama/Angst, Romance, Smut
Warnings: language, alcohol and drug use, slash, cest, graphic (extremely kinky) sex
Summary: The past few months have been full of change and upheaval for Taylor, Zac and Carrick. They’ve all grown a lot, but they’ll find they still have a lot to learn about love and family.

Co-Written by AHopper84 (me) and Shewasred.

This is the 4th and final "Lost Chapter". After this there's just one regular chapter left, and then... the end. It's been an insanely awesome ride, and we thank you all for joining us. Okay, not to get too sentimental, it ain't over yet!

NATALIE

When I was fifteen, I swore someday I would marry Taylor Hanson. It’s the same thing teenage girls have said for decades, different idols, same sentiment. But my case is rare--I actually did. At eighteen years old, I found myself not only marrying the man whose face had graced my walls, but I was also carrying his child. Dream come true, right?

Well. Sometimes reality’s a little different.

To say our marriage had been difficult would be an understatement. There were countless things threatening to tear us apart; his fame, the fact that his brothers saw him more than I did, the fans that wanted nothing more than to see us fail. I couldn’t even blame them. But there was something else, too. Taylor was unhappy.

I didn’t know if it was something I’d done, or hadn’t done, or if he resented me for how our marriage had started. I didn’t know if it was even me at all, or if he had some personal demons he was battling. I did everything I could, and most of the time he was alright. But there was always a shadow over his eyes, so subtle that I don’t think anyone else even noticed. Maybe Zac; the two of them had always had a close connection. Too close, some people said, but I was glad Taylor had someone he could turn to when I wasn’t enough.

I was in the middle of giving our youngest child a bath when I heard the phone ringing. I looked at the caller i.d., hoping it was someone who could wait, but my husband’s name flashed across the screen. I had a strange feeling, a twist in my gut, that instinctual tell that something major was about to happen. And here I was with soapy hands.

“Hey honey, I was just giving Viggo a bath, what’s up?”

“Hey hun,” he said, and I could instantly sense something was wrong. “Listen… I know this is coming out of nowhere, but I’ve been doing some thinking.”

“Uh huh…” my stomach dropped. Those words rarely brought good news. I peeked around the corner at Viggo, but he was fine, splashing away.

“I… I didn’t want to do this over the phone. But I have to do it now, before I lose my nerve.”

I let my eyes fall closed. This had been coming for a long time. I’d even made an appointment with a lawyer, just to get an idea of what the process would be. Had he seen? I thought I’d been careful, but now I wasn’t sure. But either way, it seemed he was going to be the first to say it.

“Well, you know how you’ve been saying I’m... unhappy?”

“Mhm…” I leaned against the wall, bracing for impact.

“Yeah… well, I know why. I’ve actually known for a while.” He paused, and let out a heavy sigh. “I’m bi.”

I blinked. I waited. That was it?

“You’re… you’re joking.” He had to be. That… that was his huge reveal? I stifled a laugh, not to be mean, but out of relief.

“No, I’m not joking. I almost wish I were.”

“Sweetheart, I...” I cleared my throat. This was obviously a very serious matter for him. “I’m glad you felt like you could tell me. I love you,” I added after a moment.

“I know.” He didn’t say the words back. But had I really expected him to? There was so much I wanted to say to him, but I heard a crash from the bathroom, followed by a cry. Viggo had probably tried to get out on his own.

“Sweetie, I’ve got a soapy toddler to deal with. We’ll talk about this when you get home, alright?”

“Okay. I’ll talk to you when I get home.”

“And Taylor?” I chewed my lip, thinking. “Maybe… we have more than just that to talk about.”

“Okay,” he sighed. “Bye.”

I hung up the phone and returned to Viggo. As I got him dried and dressed and put to bed, I thought about what Taylor had told me. Of course I’d already known; how could anyone who’d met him not, let alone his wife? But I thought more about what I’d assumed he was about to say. I’d been waiting for it, expecting it, and when it wasn’t what he said, I’d been almost… disappointed?

Divorce.

I could barely think the word, let alone say it out loud. Was that what I really wanted? Why else would I have felt so let down when it wasn’t what he wanted to confess? Why else was I already making appointments, for information I could have just as easily googled? It felt like when you flip a coin, and as it hangs in mid-air, you suddenly realize which side you hope it’ll land on.

As I lay in bed, waiting for my husband to return, I rolled it over in my head. The elephant in the room. Were we heading in that direction? It certainly felt like it, at least on my end. Was I just a horrible wife? I looked at the ring on my finger, spun it around with my thumb. We’d made a promise to each other. But we’d been so young, so naive; could we really know at eighteen, nineteen, what our hearts would want at thirty?

I still loved Taylor, and I always would. But maybe… maybe it really was time to let him go.

Comments

[aajox.livejournal.com]

This was hard to read, I really felt for Natalie. I really do hope she will be okay and able to move on after the divorce.

I'm so sad that this series is coming to an end, but I'm excited to see how everything gets wrapped up!